Saturday, 12 October 1861
Fine rather, i.e. ― not unfine. ―
Ay me! an unhappy life! Yet it is difficult to look back on the first sorrows of 43 years ago, which certainly caused these tortures.
Letters from Ellen, enclosing one from Fanny Boyd. ― & from Mrs. Musters ― about poor Philip Hammond’s death. Lina Musters is a treasure in her way.
Then I ? finished ? Petraija, ― & Matterhorn. ―― ? ― & Mr. Gush came up: & then at 2, I went out & walked across the park, to Daddy Hunts. What a pretty girl there was in her Egyptian dress! ― Thence to Eggs, & I saw poor Egg, who is cheerful, but I think (judging from his breathing ―) worse. ― Next, across the new world of building ― to Caroline Jones ― where I saw her, Mr. Jones, ― & 2 daughters. All the “females” are very lady-like & intelligent. I fixed to go with Caroline to Leatherhead on Friday, 18th. After this I went to the Coombes; ― Laura & Maria & Mrs. C. ―
Leaving them, I met Sydney, & afterwards, Percy: who is a truly good lad: ―
Then I walked home & dined alone at 7 on cold beef.
[Transcribed by Marco Graziosi from Houghton Library, Harvard University, MS Eng. 797.3.]
One of the saddest entries ever written. The “dined alone at 7 on cold beef” is the capstone. A man to love.